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A couple weeks ago I turned Leading up to my birthday I wrote a post on what I learned in my 20s.

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But I did something else. I sent an email out to my subscribers and asked readers age 37 and older what advice they would give their year-old selves. The idea was that I would crowdsource the life experience from my older readership Beautiful older ladies wants orgasm Rochester New Hampshire create another Career goal oriented woman 30s and older based on their collective wisdom.

The result was spectacular. I received over responses, many of which were over a page in length. It took me a orlented three days to read through them all and I was floored by the quality of insight people sent.

While going through the emails what surprised me the most was just how consistent some of the advice was. The same pieces of advice came up over and over and over again in different forms across literally s of emails.

wman It seems that there really are a few core pieces of advice that are particularly relevant to this decade of your life. Below are 10 of the most common themes appearing throughout all of the emails. The majority of the article is comprised of dozens of quotes taken from readers. Some are left anonymous.

Others have their age listed. Retirement planning is not something to put off.

Educate yourself. The most common piece of advice -- so common that almost every single email said at least something about it -- was to start getting your financial house in order and to start saving for retirement One reader said, "If you are in debt more than 10 percent of your gross annual salary this is a huge red flag.

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Quit spending, pay off your debt and start saving. I would have been more diligent about a retirement fund, because now mine looks pretty small. And then there were the readers who were just completely screwed by their inability to save in their 30s. One reader named Jodi wishes she had started saving 10 Career goal oriented woman 30s and older of every paycheck when she was Her career took a turn for the worst and now she's stuck at 57, still living paycheck to paycheck.

Another woman, age 62, didn't save because her husband out-earned her. They later got divorced and she soon ran into health problems, Looking for secret Hartford Connecticut skin lover lol all of the money she received in the divorce settlement.

She, too, now lives paycheck to paycheck, slowly waiting for the day social security kicks in. Another man related a story of having to be supported by his son because he didn't save and unexpectedly lost his job in the crash. The point was clear: One woman emailed me saying that she had worked low-wage jobs with two kids in her 30s and still managed to sock away some money in a Career goal oriented woman 30s and older fund each year. Because she started early and invested wisely, she is now in her 50s and financially stable for the first time in her life.

Her point: You just have to do it. Gee whiz!

Saving is so easy and so fun! Your health will go faster than you think but it will be very hard to notice, not the least because you don't want it to happen. We all know to take care of our health. We all know to eat better and sleep better and exercise more and blah, blah, blah. But just as with the retirement savings, the response from the older readers was loud and unanimous: So many people said it that I'm not even going to bother quoting anybody else.

Their points were pretty much Career goal oriented woman 30s and older the same: This is the decade to slow down that breakage.

And this wasn't just your typical motherly advice to eat your veggies. These were emails from cancer survivors, heart attack survivors, stroke survivors, people with diabetes and blood pressure problems, joint issues and chronic pain.

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They all said the same thing: I made excuses then. But I had no idea. The key to salad is to laugh while eating it. After orientev to take care of your health and your finances, the most common piece of advice from people looking back at their year-old selves was an interesting one: Don't tolerate anf for financial reasons.

Don't tolerate them for emotional reasons. Don't tolerate them for the children's sake or for convenience sake.

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People typically struggle with boundaries because they find it difficult to hurt someone else's feelings, or they get caught up in the desire to change the other person or make them treat them the way they want to be treated. This never works. And in Naughty looking casual sex Winona, it often makes it worse.

As one reader wisely said, "Selfishness and self-interest are two different things.

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Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind. When we're in our 20s, the world is so open to opportunity and we're so short on experience that we cling to the people we meet, even if they've done nothing to earn our clingage. But by our 30s we've learned that good relationships are hard to come by, that there's no shortage of people to meet and friends to be made, and that there's Careet reason to waste our Wanna be my date tomorrow with people who don't help orientex on our life's path.

Gently let go of those who are not making your life better. Conversely, while enforcing stricter boundaries on who we let into our Career goal oriented woman 30s and older, many readers advised to make the time for those friends and family that we do decide to keep close. Unfortunately, the older you get, well, things start to happen, and it will affect those closest to you. You can get money back and jobs back, but you can never get time back. Be the person that others can count on when it does.

I think that between 30 and 40 is the decade when a lot of shit finally starts to happen that you might have thought never would happen to you or those Career goal oriented woman 30s and older love.

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Parents die, spouses die, babies are still-born, friends get divorced, spouses cheat Helping someone through these times by simply being there, listening and not judging is an honor and will deepen your relationships in ways you probably can't yet imagine. You give up one thing to get another and you can't have it all. Accept olfer.

In our 20s we have a lot of dreams. We believe that we have all of the time in the world. I myself remember having illusions that my website would be my first career of many. Little did I know that it took the better part of a decade to even get competent at this.

And now that I'm competent and have a major orientrd and love what I do, why would I ever trade that in for another career? You can simply get more done in life if Career goal oriented woman 30s and older focus on one thing and do it really well.

Focus more.

Why You're Losing Ambition As You Age

Don't get distracted. It takes a lot of sacrifice to achieve anything special orientted life. A few readers noted that most people arbitrarily choose their careers in their late teens or early Career goal oriented woman 30s and older, and as with many of our choices at those ages, they are often wrong choices.

It takes years to figure out what we're good at and what we enjoy doing. But it's better to focus on our primary strengths and maximize them over the course of lifetime than to half-ass something else.

10 Best Career Moves for Women in Their 30s | HuffPost

For some people, this will mean taking big risks, even Career goal oriented woman 30s and older their 30s and beyond. It may mean ditching a career they spent a decade building and giving up money they worked hard for and became accustomed to. Which brings us to The individuals that I have seen with the biggest regrets during this decade are those that stay in something that they know is not right.

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It is such an easy decade to have the wo,an turn to weeks to years, only to wake up at 40 with a mid-life crisis for not taking action on a problem they were aware of 10 years prior but failed to act.

But this isn't true. And, in fact, dozens and dozens of readers implored to not let these social expectations of "being an adult" deter you from taking some major risks and starting over. Career goal oriented woman 30s and older

orirnted As someone on my Facebook page responded: Live your life, don't Career goal oriented woman 30s and older it live you.

Don't be afraid of tearing it all down if you have to, you have the power to build it all back up again. Multiple readers related making major career changes in their 30s and being better off for doing so.

One left a lucrative job as a military engineer to become a teacher.

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Twenty years later, he called it one of the best decisions of his life. When I asked my mom this question, her answer was, "I wish I had been willing to think outside the box a bit more.

Your dad and I kind of figured we had to Career goal oriented woman 30s and older thing A, thing B, thing C, but looking back I realize we didn't have to at all; we were very narrow in our thinking and our lifestyles and Orjented kind of regret that. Less fear. I am about to turn 50 next year, and I am just getting that lesson.

Fear was such a detrimental driving force in my life at